For The Love Of Port

Eric Menchen wrote:Purely hypothetical: If this had been Andy, would have pulled his tasting glass out of the car and tasted those wines before dumping?

No. Andy would have said... "Step out of the car and load those 5 cases and three bottles of fabulous wine into my trunk - and my Partner and I will have a Cuban each. Do you have a cutter and a lighter on you? Thanks. Have a nice day."

Purely hypothetical: If this had been Andy, would have pulled his tasting glass out of the car and tasted those wines before dumping?

But before ever putting a glass to his lips, he'd realize, "damn, I am not carrying a cork screw ... does anybody have a darn screwdriver?!?!!?!"

BTW, my question was posed thinking of Andy as the one driving across the border, not as the customs agent. But answers either way are fine All the talk of having a corkscrew in the car just reminded me of him keeping a Port tasting glass there.

Eric Menchen wrote:Purely hypothetical: If this had been Andy, would have pulled his tasting glass out of the car and tasted those wines before dumping?

Yes, while I don't always have a cork screw I always have a Port glass

Derek T. wrote:

Eric Menchen wrote:Purely hypothetical: If this had been Andy, would have pulled his tasting glass out of the car and tasted those wines before dumping?

No. Andy would have said... "Step out of the car and load those 5 cases and three bottles of fabulous wine into my trunk - and my Partner and I will have a Cuban each. Do you have a cutter and a lighter on you? Thanks. Have a nice day."

well said Derek

I heard that Sotheby's is auctioning off that screw driver. How much do you think it will fetch at auction? Rumor has it that it might just be the next coming of The Durand.

Roy Hersh wrote:I heard that Sotheby's is auctioning off that screw driver. How much do you think it will fetch at auction? Rumor has it that it might just be the next coming of The Durand.

It's guaranteed to work every time, just don't forget to wear a rain coat when you use it

That seems like an unfortunate and unpleasant experience for James Suckling. But, I guess it could have turned out worse. And, as others have pointed out, it does look as if he did violate to rules. Who knows, maybe there was some sort of really unpleasant new policy that was put into effect that these border guards didn't like very much. Maybe the leading harrasser just had his wife announce to him she was filing for divorce and the guy was taking it out on James?

Maybe James could turn this to his advantage, however. He could wrangle an invitation to host Saturday Night Live and he could enact this border crossing scene in a parody mocking the sadistic border guards -- dressed in pseudo-Nazi uniforms? the usual over-the-top SNL exaggeration and twising of reality? -- which could be sort of satisfying and elevate James's national profile beyond the limited circle of wine geeks?

Michael Hann wrote:Maybe James could turn this to his advantage, however. He could wrangle an invitation to host Saturday Night Live and he could enact this border crossing scene in a parody mocking the sadistic border guards -- dressed in pseudo-Nazi uniforms? the usual over-the-top SNL exaggeration and twising of reality? -- which could be sort of satisfying and elevate James's national profile beyond the limited circle of wine geeks?

I was thinking SNL skit as well, or several good jokes on Weekend Update; but I don't think James is well enough known to make the cut. If it had been Tiger Woods, that would be different.

Eric Menchen wrote:

Michael Hann wrote:Maybe James could turn this to his advantage, however. He could wrangle an invitation to host Saturday Night Live and he could enact this border crossing scene in a parody mocking the sadistic border guards -- dressed in pseudo-Nazi uniforms? the usual over-the-top SNL exaggeration and twising of reality? -- which could be sort of satisfying and elevate James's national profile beyond the limited circle of wine geeks?

I was thinking SNL skit as well, or several good jokes on Weekend Update; but I don't think James is well enough known to make the cut. If it had been Tiger Woods, that would be different.

True. I thought about that too. Maybe, instead, this could be enacted by employees at the Wine Spectator Christmas party? Maybe one of the employees could wear a James Suckling pull-over rubber face mask and enact James's part. Or, alternatively, if James is into it, he could play himself?

Of course, in reality James probably just wants to forget about this entirely. It might have been so raw and unpleasnt an experience that it will never be "funny in retrospect."